It has taken over 14 years but finally Duke Nukem Forever is available on shop shelves and, rather strangely, pigs aren't flying. I'm not going to pretend that I have played a Duke Nukem game before because with the exception of 5 minutes of 3D which I later discovered wasn't actually Duke 3D, I haven't. During these 14 years many things have happened - Guitar Hero was born, raped and then killed, Halo began, ended and then began again with Halo Reach and in addition to that Sony was hacked about 500 times. Although that last thing has happened in the space of a few months.
There are two versions of DNF available for each platform - the standard game and the Balls of Steel edition. The latter comes with a bust of Duke, some poker chips, dice, playing cards, a certificate of authenticity, a comic book and an art book detailing the past 14 years. Oh, and of course, the game itself (pretty silly if it didn't). While many were really excited for it, others had lesser expectations knowing full well that 14 years in the making wasn't going to show since for at least half of it, 3D Realms were just fapping to the characters of Mary and Kate or laughing at how funny it is throwing poo around the office. And I don't mean the in-game office, I mean the real office - they were literally throwing real-life poo around a real-life office.